Past (The First Time) - Jimin
It was a mistake. I shouldn't have done it.
Those are the sentences that keep going around in my mind, haunting me. And they will probably never go away. How can they? When I took advantage of my maknae. My best friend.
I have no excuses.
It's not his fault that he's cute. It's my fault that I couldn't resist.
He was 16. As his hyung, I should have protected him. But I didn't. I did the opposite. Caught up in my own euphoria, I lost myself.
We had just successfully filmed a music video. I was happy. It was late. The rest of the group was asleep. Jungkook and I were playing in his room, as was normal. I tickled him. His nose scrunched becomingly. His laughter bubbled over and brightened his whole face. He tried to keep quiet so as not to wake the others and his consideration made him that much more handsome.
Before I knew it, I was reaching under his shirt to tickle his bare skin. His laughter grew more uncontrolled. I had him in the palm of my hands, and it made me feel good. A wild thought came over me that made me want to make him lose control in other ways. And almost involuntarily, my hands moved down further. To his privates.
Jungkook's laughter had stopped immediately, and his eyes opened wide. I was surprised myself at what I had done. But since I had made the move, I couldn't stop. I palmed him and covered his lips with my own. He pushed against me, but I stayed locked against him. My hands went into his pants, into his boxer briefs. "Hyung." He managed to break away from my kiss for a second to try to get my attention, but my mind had only one track.
I gripped him and started to feel him grow and harden. My eyes drifted closed in bliss. His breathing began to grow heavier and more ragged. I began to pump his member in my hand. He was an above average size. But I already knew that because we had been to a sauna together before. And I had dreamed about this day ever since I met him.
I lifted my eyes to look at his face. His eyes were closed tight. A flush of red was spread across his cheeks. He was so sexy.
I pulled his pants down and watched as I pleasured him - my hand wrapped around his hardness. His stomach moved up and down quickly and heavily with short breaths. "Jungkook-ah," I whispered, completely enamored. I couldn't believe I finally had my hands on him. It was almost as if I was watching a movie of myself.
He moaned and my hard dick throbbed in my pants. I couldn't stop myself from leaning over to kiss his neck, my hand stroking him faster. "Ah!" he moaned. His hips thrust into my hand. "Come on," I urged. "Come."
His hips jutted wildly and my wish came true. His climax came and his seed spilled against my hand and the bed sheets.
Afterwards, I could only stare at the aftermath of what I'd done. Jungkook lay next to me breathing heavily, his eyes now open but glazed over. "Jungkook..." I started.
Before I could say anything, he pushed my hand away and got up from the bed. Leaving me there alone. He avoided me for a while afterwards. And I couldn't blame him.
Present
Sometimes their relationship was
normal. Sometimes it was as it always was - how they used to be.
Before "the mistake".
Tonight wasn't one of those nights.
Tonight they were celebrating their upcoming comeback. After the monumental success of DNA, Wings, and then the Love Yourself tour, they were anticipating more worldwide success with their newly completed album. They were occupying a high-end restaurant that was rented solely for them in the Gangnam area. Tonight, the men of BTS, their manager, and some other staff and higher-ups were taking the time to celebrate among themselves before full-fledged promotions started. Before all the cameras and interviews.
All seven members of the world-famous group, BTS, sat at one table with their manager at the head. A high quality white tablecloth decorated with expensive china and cutlery was draped across the table. Everyone was chattering about something or other, but Jeon Jungkook - the youngest of the group - wasn't really paying attention. His usually handsome but cute face was drawn into a faraway stare. Park Jimin, who was next to him, knew that either meant he was completely in his own world - thinking about something else - or he was upset. And for some reason, he felt it was the latter reason that had Jungkook in his own head.
Their manager was continuously looking around, hoping for the food to come. Namjoon and Hoseok were laughing about something with Taehyung who sat across from them - next to Jimin. Suga and Jin were also having their own conversation. That only left Jimin and Jungkook as the silent ones. Jimin shifted in his seat and smiled over at the conversation Namjoon, Hoseok, and Tae were having. Maybe he could find somewhere to insert himself into the casual atmosphere he currently lacked.
A phone rang and the manager got up to answer it. It was most likely the CEO of Big Hit Entertainment calling to report on his whereabouts. He would be making an appearance as well.
As if on cue, Jimin's own phone emitted a notification sound. He
pulled it out of his pocket to look at the screen. He saw that Taemin
was calling.
Taemin was a senior singer and a skilled dancer
that Jimin highly respected. And in 2020, Taemin was promoting in
America - doing a collaboration with Camilla Cabello. When Jimin
realized they would be promoting in the same place for a while, they
had made plans to meet up and hang out.
"Ohhh~" Hoseok's attention was caught by Jimin's cell phone. "Who is that? A lover?"
The group mates laughed and Jimin forced a laugh along with them, but he shot a glance at Jungkook who was still pointedly not joining in to talk with his friends. But Jimin knew he was paying attention. His body was too still and tense not to be. "No," he responded to the groups' teasing. "Taemin hyung."
"So a lover then," Namjoon teased again.
"Anii~" Jimin glanced warily at Jungkook again. He wished his group mates wouldn't tease him like this when in Jungkook's presence. Not right now.
But then again, Jimin wasn't sure why he cared so much what Jungkook thought or assumed. And he really didn't know if Jungkook cared about Jimin's business at all. Things had only been a mess of confusion after that first night that he had done something sexual to Jeon Jungkook, his favorite dongsaeng.
Past (The Second Time...And On)
Things gradually got better. Jungkook started being able to stomach casually being around him again - even if it was only when all seven members of BTS were together as a group. Then Jungkook was able to look at him again. Talk to him again. Casually touch him again. Laugh together again.
During that time, Jimin - with a gut full of guilt - gave him his space. He didn't have the courage to muster an apology because he was afraid it would just bring an unwanted subject back to the surface again. As time passed, he hoped it would be easier and easier for Jungkook to push what had happened between them to the back of his mind. To ignore it. Pretend it didn't happen. And then forget it altogether. He knew that's probably what Jungkook wanted. And as things started to get better between them again, he realized it must be working.
Finally, at some point, they were able to hang out on their own again. Jungkook was able to sit next to him without being tense. They were able to stay up all night playing video games, just the two of them. They no longer slept in the same room, but Jimin told himself that was okay. He couldn't be greedy. Not after what he had done. The friendship they had managed to salvage was more important.
But one night, as they were the only two unable to go to sleep - as was per usual - Jimin was happy to have Jungkook climb into his bed once again. They simply read manga together for about 45 minutes, but Jimin felt bliss. He had hopes that there relationship really had returned back to normal. That was until he felt Jungkook turn his head and start staring at him.
Jimin met his gaze, curious about what had taken Jungkook's focus off of his manga. But Jungkook hadn't said anything. He just continued to stare into Jimin's eyes. And with their faces being only a couple of inches apart, Jimin couldn't force himself to look away. Something like curiosity and determination shone in Jungkook's eyes and then it happened...those same eyes flickered to Jimin's lips. Jimin involuntarily held his breath. 'Couldn't be...' he thought. But he wasn't able to finish his thought because Jungkook's lips were pressing against his. Warm and soft.
Jimin's mind went completely blank. And his body went on autopilot.
With his heart pounding in his chest, he allowed Jungkook to roll his upper body over Jimin's and take control of the kiss. He opened his mouth for Jungkook's wandering tongue; he moaned softly when he felt a gentle nip on his bottom lip.
He allowed Jungkook to take his hand and slide it to his engorged member. He was happy to hold him again.
That night was different than the first. He stroked Jungkook's member without fear, shame, or doubt. Jungkook wanted this. He had led Jimin's hand there himself. In the back of his mind, Jimin knew he would still battle himself on whether it was okay for him to do this with someone of Jungkook's age, but in the heat of the moment, those worries weren't even in his mind. He was just filled with the happiness and desire of wanting Jungkook and being wanted in return.
He opened his eyes to view the pleasure playing across Jungkook's face. He was freer in his expression than the first time. He didn't mind showing that he enjoyed this. Jungkook's fist clenched Jimin's shirt as the older increased the speed of his stroking. "Ahh~ Hyung~" he moaned.
Jimin breathed lustily. He was rock hard in his pants and Jungkook's loss of control was driving him crazy.
He pushed Jungkook onto his back and yanked Jungkook's pants and underwear completely clear of his hips. Leaving the fabric to bunch around the younger's shins. And then without thinking much about it, he sank his full lips down over Jungkook's beautiful hardness. That's how Jimin would describe Jungkook's penis. Beautiful. He never thought he'd ever describe an appendage as such, but here he was. Worshipping a beautiful thing with his tongue.
Jungkook's eyes widened with surprise at the first sensation of being engulfed by Jimin's mouth. Then his eyes fluttered closed with a breathy moan.
He let his hands rest gently on Jimin's head as the older moved up and down - the feeling of the movement of Jimin's head arousing Jungkook even more. He pulled air between his teeth, and his toes curled. "Jimin hyung," he moaned.
Jungkook's auditory displays of pleasure urged Jimin on. He hollowed his cheeks, sucking harder on the beauty that was Jungkook. The younger groaned, his hips involuntarily jolting upwards and his hand pushing down to push deeper into the warmth that was Jimin's mouth. Jimin took Jungkook's lustful passion readily, easily relaxing his throat to allow Jungkook to go all the way in. Jimin had never done this to anyone before, but it was coming naturally.
He gripped the base of Jungkook's penis and began to bob up and down quickly with the intention of finishing Jungkook off.
Jungkook panted and gripped the sheets, his hips moving lewdly along with Jimin's movements. He knew he was coming soon. He announced it, giving Jimin time to move away if he wanted. But Jimin slid down further on his shaft, taking him all in once again. And Jungkook came, his muscles tensing.
As he came down from his high, it was unlike anything he had ever felt before. He lost a couple of minutes because his whole body was still tingling. When he came back to the present, Jimin was leaning over him with a small smile on his face. "Are you okay?" he asked.
Jungkook nodded, unable to speak.
Jimin could see how much pleasure he had given to Jungkook, and it made his chest swell with pride and happiness. A happiness that he fell asleep with, cuddling against Jungkook.
When he had woken up the next morning, however, Jungkook was no longer with him. And like after the first night...their interactions were as friends. Jungkook didn't bring up what had happened. He wasn't awkward around Jimin like he had been the first time, but he didn't acknowledge any change between them either. So there was no change. Jimin followed his lead. He acted normal. As a friend. They didn't mention the times he had gotten Jungkook off.
Jimin thought that was that. He was disappointed, but like the first time...he comforted himself with the thought that at least their camaraderie wasn't affected.
But then it happened a third time. They were horsing around on the couch until Jungkook pinned him on his stomach and began to grind his pelvis against Jimin's ass completely clothed. Of course Jimin had been turned on by it, and allowed it...again. He unashamedly came in his pants as Jungkook dry humped him to his own satisfaction.
At this point, Jimin sort of expected that they would act like nothing happened again. But he was still a bit disappointed when that was exactly the case. Nothing changed.
And then it became a pattern. Jungkook would come to Jimin, get jacked off, get pleasured by Jimin's tongue, or Jimin would allow the younger to dry hump against him until he got the pleasure he wanted. And the more it happened, the more Jimin realized he was being used. Jungkook came to him whenever he wanted to get off. There was nothing special about it. Jimin could be anyone. He realized he was just the easy one that Jungkook realized he could get away with it with. And Jungkook was a young man with uncontrollable sexual urges. If he could have a warm body to rub against instead of his own hand, of course he would choose that option. Jimin realized he was simply the equivalent of a masturbation tool to Jungkook.
The realization hurt. But Jimin didn't stop allowing Jungkook to come to him. Because pathetically, he liked giving Jungkook pleasure - even if it cheapened him and his feelings. Besides...whose fault was all of this? He was the one who had started it in the first place.
So yes, he was there whenever Jungkook wanted. That is...until he realized he could have more.
Past - 45 Minutes Prior to the Present
"Hyung, we should go to the Statue of Liberty in New York when we get back to America," Jungkook said excitedly. They were in their transport van on the way to dinner to celebrate yet another anticipated upcoming success album. It was just them the driver and a coordinator noona riding in this particular van. The other members were spread out in two other separate vehicles.
"Okay," Jimin said, smiling back at Jungkook. "It'll have to be on a day off though. And who knows when we'll get one of those."
"Yeah," Jungkook said with a chuckle. "I'll try to sway the manager."
Jimin chuckled. If anyone could finagle a way for them to get a day off, it would be Jungkook. Jimin had never seen someone who was so aware of their charms. It was annoying. And also very becoming. "Do that, Jungkookie."
Jungkook smiled at the endearment Jimin used toward him.
This was it. The casual banter of friendship they had so easily maintained over the last few years. Even though they sometimes did more than friends would do in the hours of the night. But they had become experts at creating unspoken rules between themselves. What happened some days in the night, stayed some days in the night. Every other day, they were as normal. Just friends and group mates.
It usually worked out just fine. But sometimes, Jimin would make a mistake. And he found himself making one tonight.
"I also have to find time to meet up with Taemin," he had said - the casual conversation of a friend. "He's in America too, and I'm excited to see him."
Silence.
Jimin's stomach dropped. Sometimes he didn't know the unspoken rules. Or there was one added that he could not foresee. This was one of those times.
The mood in the van immediately shifted.
"He's a hyung I haven't seen in a while," he said softly, trying to get the casual atmosphere back.
Jungkook was always a little sensitive when it came to Taemin. Jimin didn't exactly know why. He had his suspicions of course, but he had nothing to confirm it. As was the case with many aspects of their relationship.
The fact was that Jimin loved Taemin as a sunbae. He looked up to him, respected him, was wholly flattered whenever the renowned singer and dancer would give him attention and compliment him. And Jungkook hated that Jimin thought so highly of the handsome sunbae.
Jungkook suspected that Jimin had a crush on the man, but either Jimin was in denial about it or he knew and was keeping it from Jungkook for whatever reason. The thought made Jungkook's stomach twist.
And that's the state their relationship was in for tonight when
they arrived at dinner.
Present
Jimin received another text on his phone. He opened it and saw that he had received an image. Taemin playfully blowing a kiss, and the picture was captioned reading...See you soon.
Jimin couldn't help but to smile.
That is until he felt Jungkook's hand on his upper thigh, drawing his attention to him. With eyes straight ahead as if he wasn't doing anything, Jungkook gently pressed his fingers into the area right next to his member. He knew what that did to Jimin. Jimin tried to discreetly push Jungkook's hand away, but Jungkook didn't allow it. He let his hand drift between Jimin's legs, cupping his semi-hard member and Jimin gripped the utensil in front of him regretting - once again - the fact that he had created a monster.
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